IVF Consult and Start Cycle Day

Well ladies and gentleman...here we go! My meds are ordered and will be here tomorrow. I start taking them on 12/30. I go back on 1/2 for the first look at my ovaries to see how they are growing. I will be closely monitored and I won't know when I will be going back. I have appointments scheduled every day from 1/2 to 1/7. I won't need them all obviously...but just incase I do, I have the times I need to be able to take a half day at school.

I know I will be on Follistim, Monapar, Ganarelix and Ovadrel. I will be shooting up twice daily. Now don't you guys be to jealous...and no I will not share!

I'm excited and scared and then excited again. Here is the basic idea of what will happen in the next couple weeks. I will shoot up with drugs, again I'm not sharing. They will grow as many eggs as they can get me to grow. Once the eggs are mature they will extract the eggs from my ovaries. They will put them together with Jeffrey's little dudes and fertilize my eggs by hand. (I think his little dudes haven't been asking for directions to the eggs.....men....shesh!) They will let the eggs grow in the dish and multiply. After 5 or 6 days they will pick the strongest ones (2 or 3) and put them back. We then wait and HOPE that they attach to my uterus. I can then become pregnant...we hope!

So say your prayers and help us hope that this is the last step to help us complete our family!

Christmas Program Season

Well Jeffrey and I got all of our blood work done for our IVF cycle, on Monday thanks to our Health Department. They did it all and saved us a trip to Indy.  We will start getting my meds in order and everything will start coming together soon.

It is time for Christmas Concerts and Christmas Programs. We had ours last night and the Kindergarten kids were adorable! I love my job!! Jeffrey has a concert tomorrow and has his junior high concert next week. He has also started musical practice. Needless to say I don't see Jeffrey much during the week anymore.

Christmas is 2 weeks away. I can't wait to go home and see my family. I miss them more and more. It will be so much fun to be in a crowded house with everyone talking and no place to sit. Just to be surrounded with all of my aunts, uncles, cousins, close friends, and my family.

Holy crap batman!!

Well we had a phone consult with my doctor this morning. Jeffrey and I sat and listened to what she had to say. She is very sweet and doesn't sugar coat anything for us. She gave us all the info my brain could process and we were shocked. She wants to start our IVF cycle this month!!! I mean like I go in for my first appointment December 26th! Yeah crazy! She is so great and I'm so excited that she is willing to do it this way.

Needless to say I don't know what to think...I'm excited and scared. Nervous yet ready to get going.

Even though Jeffrey's swimmers are strong they are going to aid the process. They are also going to let them get to the blastocyst phase (Day 5) and then they will put them back and we can just hope and pray they attach.

We will enjoy this Christmas season with a renewed sense of hope. Knowing full well that my doctor is on the fast track to knock us up!

Our IUI Journey is taking some turns....

Well its been wild this past weekend. We had Thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws and it was absolutely delish!!! They had SO much food!! Then we were part of the crazy people and went shopping! We got a lot of great stuff and we didn't run into one rude person!! People are so nice down here. I even struck up conversations with people. Weird for me...I know.

Well we also found out that our last IUI wasn't successful either. I took this one harder than when I miscarried. I don't know why its just I had so much hope for this one to work and when it didn't I was miserable. I was thinking why me. Have all my prayers just been whispered into the wind? Why should I keep thinking that things will go right for me and then realize they usually never do. Not for me. I was so mad at my belief/faith I refused to go to church Sunday. Yes, I was that angry. I couldn't comprehend why this was happening to me. I then chatted with my TT girls, Jeffrey, and my other half, Adam. It was hard for me to admit that I felt like a failure. The guilt I feel is horrible!!! I was a couch potato for two days. But talking it out helped. I still have some built up anger and I know Jeffrey has paid for it and I feel so bad.

I have also been scarce on FB...for a reason. No offense to anyone so please don't take this the wrong way. I can't really handle all my friends and there baby posts. I go through phases and right now it hurts and I can't handle it. So it is safer for me to just stay away. I do pop on every once an a while. It is me...thats all and that is how I will deal with my feelings right now.

So here we are...I went to Indy today to get my baseline for our next IUI. Well we get on with the ultrasound and there is a HUGE black spot in my right ovary. Yep...some of you guessed it. I have a 23mm cyst hiding in there. So no IUI this month. I will be on BC for this month to get rid of that cute little rock. Then as I bargained with Jeffrey after the new year we are moving on to IVF or Invitro fertilization. I will be on BC this month and in January. We will then start our road to IVF in February. This road will be a hard one. Its pretty scary and i'm really nervous about it, but I'm lucky I know a few people that have successfully gone through it. So if I have questions I know who to go to.

Please lets hope and pray that this is that last thing we will have to do to complete our family. We will need all the extra thoughts and prayers the next couple months.

And...as I say it once more....here we go!